So since school has started I have to see my ex-husband more often. His mother watches our girls at his house and when I get off work to pick them up he's home already...his wife normally isn't. Lately with the meet the teacher day, first day of kindergarten, and picking the girls up from his house....this is the most we've been all together in 2 years. It's very weird how we both fall into the way we use to act around eachother before the mess. It's weird to parent my kids with their father right their parenting them as well.
It was right before my girls turned 2 and 3 when it all fell apart. I need to get it through my head that this is a glimpse of what things would be like if we could be friends....not what it would be like if we were a family. Can I drop the grudge? Your husband leaves you for your bestest friend...the matron of honor at your wedding....the one you cried to when you didn't understand why he started asking for a divorce all of a sudden. It's hard to not want to make them pay for it for as long as possible. In the back of my head I also feel that if I just act like everything is "ok...all is forgiven" that it would strenghthen their relationship. Not sure if that makes sense to anyone else, but its almost like giving them my blessing. Not that I have any control over their relationship...I figured that out 2 1/2 years ago.
Don't get me wrong, I am civil to both of them. My girls have never heard me talk bad about either one of them. We all work around eachothers schedules. We just don't do functions together. Hearing her call him babe still gives me chills. Looking at their adorable 1 year old throws me off....I try to act like shes any other toddler and smile at her when she smiles at me...but when my youngest tries to bring her to me to carry her, I weird out. Try to come up with something that my youngest will find an acceptable reason for me not wanting to hold their half sister. I told her that maybe the baby shouldn't be outside (I always wait at the door step and avoid stepping into their home.)
How do other people do it? Am I being childish?
Is there a "right" way to handle this situation? I haven't seen a script anyplace. Not too many instruction manuals on "How To Treat the Child of Your Cheating Ex-Husband and His Slut Wife that Used to be Your Best Friend."
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